wanney the coolest

2007-12-08T00:59:00.000+08:00

i've been busy with the fucking internship and work.
i'm not denying that i'm tired.really tired.
for the past one month,i only had 5 hrs of sleep everyday.and u can see me either at ttsh or vivo almost everydae.
my mom shouted at me the other day "kau nie tak tau nak rest ke?hari-hari kerje.pergi stop la keje levis ko tu!ko nie dah takda life kepe?"-the mom was not motivating me anymore.she even saw through me that i'm no longer hercheerful,loud and bubbly girl who didn't know how to make her own milo.she says i'm no longer her girl who use to go shopping and gossips about our everydae life with her.it has been a month since i've tasted her cooking.i miss everything!

i was out with chai sia the other day and i cried my heart out.i told her that i miss my life.i'm not blaming anyone but myself.my ability to overlook so many important things in regards to my growing life makes me feel so irresponsible.

aini has been fetching me from work whenever we wanna meet.thank you for being so supportive of me.i'm so fortunate and thankful to be your friend.zoukout was cancelled,mos was cancelled and i hope i won't be cancelling our next date!i promise.

azhar,get well soon.next time,movie on me.

farina,we shall meet up.

netty,i miss you la bitch.

marilyn,i try to come for your engagement ceremony.

kak aini,sorry i didn't make it to your wedding.

siti,trust me we will be just fine once again.there was never once upon a time.

atiqah,we meet up soon.

yan ching,i miss you.

the list goes on....sorry friends.i try my best to meet up with you guys soon.my time management sucks ar.

to you.
i'm in love again.but you never seem to let go of her.
you make me wanting more every single day.

2007-10-29T23:27:00.000+08:00

i miss our fagging sessions.

jom ar netttttiiiikkkkkkkkk!

2007-10-29T22:37:00.000+08:00

i was reading a friend's blog,and instead of grinning from ear to ear,i felt bitter for her.
even though i will no longer hear her cries,i do hope she's fine.
but perhaps,this is karma in returning you the favour.

i was talking to farina the other day trying hard to hold back my tears.
she mention something so strong that i never regret telling her my dilemma.
perhaps its true,the girl was saying all that about me just to make up for what she lack.i dun blame her,its more like a reverse psychology.its almost two month since i last saw or heard from her.i'm trying hard to erase my thoughts of her,give me time.you remind me of a close friend i had,just like you,she paid to much attention the boyfriend.i dared to say all i've said about you in my previous entry because i never had faith in your relationship.i'm aware that i'm not some marriage specialist to actually make such remarks,but i'm just concerned.
take a time off and think.

i'm worried for my mom now.she was doing her daily self-breast examination and found this small lump.went to our family doctor and was referred to ttsh.appointment is next month.praying hard its not malignant.

this is funny.

chai sia:ey itu hari my ex call pukol tiga pagi tanya macam mane nak pergi ke kajang dari puchong.
wanie:abeh?
chai sia:abeh aku marah la.
wanie:wat u say?
chai sia:aku cakap "ey kau call aku pukol tiga pagi untok tanye itu aje?da buta-buta pagi kau kalau tak nak tido aku nak tido ok?" lepas tu aku letak.
wanie:aye bodoh,pagi-pagi buta la bodoh.name je orang malaysia,melayu hancur siak.

chai sia was staring at something outside the shop.
wanie:aye,wat u looking at?
chai sia:no la got chio bu baru jalan.
wanie:mane?
chai sia:oh she just passed away la (while showing me the direction where that "chio girl" was headin to.)
i was laughing damn hard by this time.
wanie:passed BY la gile.

chai sia never fails to make me laugh.she makes my day at work.and she loves to treat me to dinner.i love her.
and she pampers her girlfriend alot.cheebye are kau minah.

ok bye.
xx will your personal attacks make up for what you lack?

2007-10-28T14:11:00.000+08:00

just got back from KL.
jalan raya.jauh betol saudara-mara aku.haha.
the bro is badan besar but bersemangat kan semut.
it was a last min decision to balik kampung at batu pahat,johor.
but my bro was hesitating giving a damn lame reason that his not that sure about the way into the kampung area.
so we owned the road in the middle of the jungle blasting some mengaji punya cd.i told him to buka lagu.
"balik kampung....whoah......balik kampung....whoah balik kampung,hati riang " from allahyaham sudirman.
then he said "EY BIAR LA BUKA MENGAJI MALAM-MALAM GINIE.HANTU PON TAKOT NAK DEKAT"

even though i tried to put up a brave front while chanting "bismillah" silently,in front of the bro cos i dun want him to be afraid,i was damn scared as well.i was anxious cos i've watched too many pochong and pontianak video.
i swear i was expecting a lady-in-white to flag our car hoping to get in then got stuck in a cemetery and going round in circles to get ourselves out.
the mom dad and bro was sleeping soundly.nicely tucked in.
however,we were lucky.cause i think the spirits were themselves shocked by having three cars all of a sudden into the jungle.
after two hours,we've reached the kampung.

ok,so i've decided to take up manual.
i got my first practical by the uncle at kampung and i think i'm a safe and qualified driver now without going through all those TP bullshits.i love driving!!
thank god the four hrs ride to KL was not that bad as i was busy watching prison break three.haha.
go download people,its out.
i was trying my best not to sleep as i wanted to be a supportive sister since it was my bro first maiden voyage in wheels.

enough of malaysia.
aini and azhar,we will meet up soon okie.
aku miss korang.dah satu bulan tak jumpe.and sorry didn't get to join for the jalan raya.

met up with farina the other day.she gave me a g-shock watch.
minah-rich.thanks though.
when we meeting again?i wanna give you the levi's shirt.

meet up with faridah and atiqah at ttsh the other day.i miss them.
bile korang nak datang raya rumah aku nie?hari-hari aku duduk depan pintu menunggu kehadiran korang.

netty,lets clubbing sooning aryte?
i miss you.

ok,i'm working later.so need to siap-siap.
someone's birthday coming.wat a bore,and a chore!

2007-10-21T23:17:00.001+08:00

second chances they don't matter,people never change.

once a whore,you're nothing more.

i'm sorry that will never change.

well,theres a million other girls who do it just like you.

looking as innocent to get to who.

and i've watched his wildest dream come true.

not one of them involving you.

2007-10-21T22:29:00.000+08:00

selamat hari raya.
to all my muslim counterparts.
and maaf zahir dan batin to all those who know me.

ok,i know i'm late for the messages.
raya was fun.haha.but malam raya lagik fun.
buka puasa,dgr takbir,then lap tingkap kemudian susun kuih sambil nyanyi lagu raya.even though i was workin mornin that friday,i appreciate the quality time i had with the family after that.heh.then,suddenly the whole family was talking about raya in our yishun home.memories.everyone misses yishun.if only..

first day was fuckin busy.the first customer,nenek dan pakcik aku.pukol 9 dorang dah ketuk pintu.
aku dengan air liur basi dan rambut yang tak glamor langsung kene sambut tetamu.nasib baik nenek sey,kalau orang lain aku suruh dorang duduk bawa minum kopi dulu baru naik.haha.from there,everyone keeps "assalamualaikum-ing" my home.hahahahahah.till 2am then i get to sleep.sampai lupa sey nak mintak maaf dgn parents sendiri.anak derhaka betul.

2nd day,woke up at ten then siap and the mintak maaf session sebelum keluar rumah untuk berjalan raya ey.
aku suka.even though i no longer get duit raya,but i'm still excited.the food,the kuih,the laughter,the touch-up makeup every rumah is exhilarating.u know.then the makcik2 will be boasting about their sons/daughter job and salary and cert.some show-off barang kemas.pakai gelang sampai tangan tak bole bengkok la ey.tak ke dasyat tu.
riak nak mampus.

ok enough of raya.attachment tmr.
internship in 3 more weeks.then,insyaalah,i'm a qualified nurse aredy by february.
work has been boring.a lot of wayang going on between the supervisor and the new in-charge.thank-god i'm only a part-timer.sales has been decreasing.fuck.haha.
and now i can proudly declare that i'm the youngest in my store cause 4 of the other staff are 25.so the five of us bought 4D (2504) for tonight.but tak kene sey.

oh ya people,levis signature is having JEANS TRIAL PROMOTION.for every jeans u try on,u will get $15 voucher and levis' signature organiser.we only have 500 voucher and organiser to give away.so hurry,try any pair of jeans and grab the freebies.levi's signature boutique are at vivocity (beside nike shop),suntec city (near the new fountain) and tampines mall (opposite macdonald).

i'm meeting farina this wed.yay yay.

2007-10-09T02:26:00.000+08:00

i was watching backstreet boys latest video and smiling to myself.hee.
but its funny to see AJ with a mohawk and heavily tattooed body singing some pop music.
he looks like kurt cobain singing "get down,get down and move it all around."" or "i want it that way"
so hilarious.ok nvm,put that one aside.

i got my well-deserved break today.at last.i woke up at 4pm and realise theres 6 msges on my hp waiting for me.
from aini,aini (my colleague),netty,my dad and lina.
so i decided to have my bath and read the papers.then,i was asleep again.mom woke me up 5 mins to break-fast.
haha.takda guna nye aku puase.was planning to lepak ard 8 at vivo with the colleague and lina but my mom wants me to go geylang with her.spoil market betol.takpe,raya nye pasal aku sanggup.setahun sekali beb.
then suddenly,this particular booth stole my attention,THEY WERE SELLING FAKE LEVI'S.no idea how much la.but the fake looks so fake.understand?macam dorang kutip dari sungai road abeh just jahit the red tag kat tepi.heartache sey tengok,patotla business tak maju2 si levis nie.haizz.sakit mata tengok itu jeans.berat mata memadang berat lagi bahu yang memikul ey.takpe,setahun sekali je mcm ginie.aku sabar.then walk and walk,i saw flying dutchman.haha.sesat beb.aku rase dia nak shopping for christmas.deepavali belum datang dah semangat nak christmas itu kafir.
then my mom wants me to get the baju kebaya manik2.sial ar,tak senonoh siot.dah macam pengantin tak naik pelamin punya case.gue tak rela.i told aini the other day that whatever stuff that i ate these days,taste exactly like pineapple tart.hahah.betul nye semangat raya.aku suka banget kuih tart.

ok.put geylang and raya tepi.
i think i miss yishun.kepala pisang.

2007-10-07T00:53:00.000+08:00

satu hari di hari raya

ku lihat wajah suci ibuku

ku lihat wajah kasih ayahku

ku gembira.

2007-10-06T01:31:00.000+08:00

2 weeks attachment is over.i'm still left with 15 weeks.
INTERNSHIP SUCKS.
operating theatre makes my skin dry.the place is cold and clammy.a week there makes me cyanosed.
and mount alvernia surgeons are dickheads.the anaesthetist are worst!u shud get the picture by now.

i'm working at levis tmr.work again.i seriously need a break!adding on,i'm coughing like no one's business.
fuck,i no longer feel nine-teen anymore.the responsibilities is so overpowering.
as a muslim,student,friend,daughter,sister and colleague.if only i could dictate my life smoothly with no complain regardless of all this challenges.

my pay and allowance is gone.cause i've decided to give duit zakat to all my cousins during raya.
not forgetting green packet for the grandmom as well.raya is no longer fun when u started working already.
nvm,i had my fair share yesteryears.

you gave me a reason to make yourself feel insignificant again.
it will be a vicious cycle as long as the trust is not there.
perhaps,it was a white lie at that moment.i close one eye.
believe whatever you want to,cause i dun mind.i dun have the time to think,ape lagi nak ada boyfriend.
haha.nvm,my ego too hot too handle.

ok.i miss farina the moment i saw her face in the mag.
cheebye punya minah.hiatus selalu.
i call you.you pick up.we set the time and place.then we meet up for ice-cream.on?

haha.netty makes me proud to be looking short and petite.

ok.enough.
goodnite world.

2007-09-26T10:23:00.000+08:00

i wish there is something new.something more,compelling and vital.
i miss vivo.i hate ttsh.
emergency posting is not cool.
those who have not done their emergency posting,go brush up on ur ECG lanmarks,know our algorithm and injection skills.ok,easy shits.

it was almost midnite.

i felt alone,even though he was a feetstep away.

if only things didnt change and i'm still gutsy.

balls of fury,anyone?
internship sucks.

have a blessed ramadan people.

2007-09-22T23:57:00.000+08:00

give her a break.please.

she's just doin what she did best,entertainin.cut the crap of her being "tryin to be in the spotlight again".

her life has always revolve around the spotlight wat?!its a matter of now and then thingy lingering.

she's still my idol though,no matter how stoopid,ugly,bimbotic she is.cause i grew up listenin to her.

but that vma night,i think the dancers stands out.instead of her!ok,aku dah mcm ken lim.pandai2 kasi comment.

oh ya.jose mourinho has been sacked or he quit?

coward ey.few days before the match with man utd he make such a hoo-haa.babi betol.attention-seeker.

i love to play bowling.and yest,hafiz dgn aini dgn azhar ajar aku main pool.

i think my right arm is swelling up.muscle nak grow beb.

today is my one week of being sick anniversary.i'm having a running nose and cough.

so the other day,i was late to work and i call up my in-charge to get me 2 packets of tissue.

and to my surprise,she bought me 48 packets of tissue at watsons.she said it was on sale.on top of that,she stole a toilet roll just for me.how cool and thoughtful ey.haha.and sales has been *out of words*.

everyone in my store is resigning.except for me.i dun want to have a new boss and in-charge.

FUCK,I'M CONTEMPLATING ABOUT JOINING FOX.BUT WINGTAI PAY IS $4.80 PER HR.no good.

oh ya,i've been accepted by ttsh.and i pass my basic theory.alhamdulilah.

but,i lost my wallet 2 days ago.

my i/c,PDL,debit card all gone.

all thanks to shane.he gave me the bad luck.

thanks to huda,chai sia,gilbert on giving me advice.aini thanks for the cash.

my personal ceti/loan-shark.best one cos she offers no interest.

now i'm joinin the we-got-no-ic foundation with azhar and aini as the founder and ceo respectively.

nie baru betol kawan sejati!keluar bawa passport ey!

i'm excited cause i'm goin shopping soon.but the tots of attachment makes me puke.

cheebye betol.i want raya to come.then i can go collect duit raya.

people if u see me knock on your door during the festive season,dun chase me out please.

cause i'm still15.

ok.enough for the nite.saman masih belum baya.

2007-09-17T20:17:00.000+08:00

after ten fucking days,you apologised.
dun you think its a bit too long?why now and not back then?are you making friends with us cause your birthday is coming?i'm not surprised if that is the reason.really.
whateover it is,a standing ovation for your ego.you drive me to a corner whereby i hated you so much.
i'm sick of hearing your moaning groaning and whining about your boyfriend.
as a friend,i listened religiously thinking that it will lighten her burden.HOWEVER.
this may sound contradicting BUT at the end of the day,its you that eventually crawls back to him.
dun you see it as hypocritical?you say one thing and do the other.

no matter how pathetic and bland i am right now,its you who i feel sorry for.
you've made too many wrong moves,judgement and devotion.
to be honest,i can count with my fingers and little toes on your commitment and sacrifices for us,your friend!
oh wait,am i even one?cos you never seem to be there for our special day.
just to reinforce,this relationship of yours doesn't sound promising.
dun get me wrong,i'm not cursing,i've seen it too many times.
you can call me naive or two-dimensional.cause my world only revolves black OR white,yes OR no.geddit?
dun come crying back to me when he ditches you.(so much of a friend eh)

aini and azhar had been doing a good job by calming me down.
but,too bad i'm not that forgiving.i'm just possessed by my alter-ego whenever your name is being mention.
the both of them have been a great friend to you i must say.
but....I DUN THINK YOU EVEN HAVE TIME FOR THEM.

i have to confess that i lied when i said "nvm.,it's ok".
i didn't mean it at all.you dont have to explain,apologise or whatever.
haha,i'm giving you time to concentrate on the boyfriend aryte?which the two of you will last like,lemme guess,sumpah tak sampai kahwin.
k tak kelakar.oh ya,dun have frens for the time being.
i dun want to see you with white hair soon due to thinking too hard on who to spent time with.

focus on your commitment,chant this when ur having difficulties.
"WO KE YI DE".
ok.inside jokes.
till then,nice knowing you.

2007-09-11T13:26:00.000+08:00

was out to tiong bahru yest with atiqah and faridah.
then had dinner together,talking about stuff as we normally do.and the funny part is,when i said "eh its time to go" the both of them dengan selamba nye keluar kedai tak bayar.and aku pon ikot sama.SUMPAH KITA TERLUPA PASAL BILL.nasib baik tu waitress panggil aku ckp "maam,your bill!".
kalau tak kita dah makan makanan tak halal.ok sembarang.

was supposed to meet shane yest,but decided to stick around with azhar and gang instead.
and yest was jiwang session ey azhar.anoh tak abes2 nyanyi and joget.farhan dgr lagu teros nangis.ape saje,tak macho langsung!
haha.and amirul takot anjing.initially we wanted to cut thru padang to get to the bus stop near the capitol building.
then suddenly we heard some dog barking in the middle of the field.so farhan and amirul wanted to take the long-cut larh to be safe.
then suddenly azhar stop,and say "ey sial ar itu pompan kene kejar",then me and farhan stop to see.who knows we can safe her if she really got bitten by that "town-dog".haha.macam paham.
then amirul dah kat depan.sumpah dia jalan laju.
he was shouting "dah la azhar,cepat la jalan.jalan la.....!"hahaha.fireman ape kau nie takot anjing?!
so funny sia.

ok people.ramadan in a 2 days.
exam results on friday.
my interview with ttsh in 3 days.
sumpah aku tak xcited.
lo and behold,pay day is nearing.aku suka itu part.

*AINI..SI AZHAR SPOIL MARKET BETUL.AKU DAH SEMANGAT NAK MAKAN SEOUL GARDEN THIS SATURDAY KAN.DIA CAKAP DGN AKU SEMALAM DIA ADA BOLA ON THAT DAY.KAU RASA PATUT KE DIA CHEAT AKU PUNYA FEELING?

2007-09-04T23:15:00.000+08:00

i was out with shane last night,with one condition which the both of us agreed.that is,no nonsense (makin-out) this time.haha.how cute ey!
no worries,no hanky-panky ey nettik.

was out with the mom and bro to johor.the fags there are so so so cheap la dey.
aku tak bole tahan sial.cheebye betol.kawan-kawan,jom la kita pegi johor.
AZHAR PEGI CHOP KAU PUNYA PASSPORT LA GILA!

yay yay,tmr i'm workin.
my levis lies over the ocean,my levis lies over the sea.
oh ya,i dreamt of my late grandad.i hope his restin in peace.amin.
next week is ramadan.and the hutang puase belum bayar.and my basic theory is next week.my 3rd time ey people.kalau fail jugak,aku tak tahu ape nak cakap.

2007-09-01T00:33:00.000+08:00

i'm gonna miss my power rangers.

i'm totally broke now.like only 8 bux in wallet and twenty in bank.

how like that?and faridah bdae is soon.real soon.and so is aini's.

i'm workin tmr morning and i'm not looking forward.especially the waking up part.thank god i live near town and i'm starting to appreciate bendemeer.

oh ya,aini is missing.you can find her photo at mrt stations soon.if anyone happens to bump into her,ask her to give me or siti or azhar a call.last seen at tan tock seng hosp!

i have the sudden craving to have maggi now.lucky ramadan is nearing,then i won't be wasting my money on fags.

who knows,tats a turning point for me to quit.i need your prayers pple.

ok.enough for the nite.

2007-08-31T01:09:00.000+08:00

F.U.C.K

i told you then,i'm saying it again.i'm not fucking interested.
so stop askin me out.
i'm just being nice by replyin your messages.maybe i'm wrong.
furthermore,i don't know you at all!

2007-08-31T00:34:00.000+08:00

i love the levis top (as above).

cheebye betol,if only i got the cash.

working has been tiring cause i was busy dancing,singing and standing.the only thing that keep me motivated to go work is the "nike" guy whose workin beside my store.

if not then i satisfy myself with trying on all the jeans and tops admiring myself and telling them

"ey they shud get me as their model sia".hurhur.

and yest.there was a BIG fight at vivo city involving grp of mats vs one angmoh.the angmoh so fucking strong i tell you.he was grabbing that mats head and knocked at the glass panel 3 times.

hahahaha.and its right in front of my shop.so,free entertainment.

ok nvm.was hanging out with farina just now and how i miss those days.not that i'm raking up the past,but at least i know the situation better.

*siti and farina-we go lepak under the moonlight again ok!

2007-08-26T02:24:00.001+08:00

i'm glad when you called.but i was hesitating to answer.
i miss you,no doubt,but i was well-trained to curb my emotions.
i'm just glad that azhar and aini is there for me.at least.haha.

to shane,i'm glad that the both of us has come to a decision where taking a step back is crucial.
it may seem unfair,but things are getting so complicated that i succumbed to the situations with no question ask.
i'm sorry if it seems like a start for you,but i dun wan to jeopardize what i have now.

to huda,no one is a replacement of no one.
siti is never a replacement of u,instead,she's another person in my life who i share my life experiences to.
she makes me happy,she jokes like theres no tomorrow.she listens to my rants without any complains.
she's another unque individual that makes me comfortable no matter how stupid i act,talk or behave.
the meetup just now was great.even though it may seem like a solemn event for u,u never fail to squeeze the brain juice out of me due to laughter.
i'm glad u invited me and aini.
just know that forgetting or replacing you is never my (and aini) intentions.i'm just sad that things just go sour for us.

ok enough of the mushy-ness.
my grandmom had just strike 4D.2nd prize somemore.
she's giving me some of her winnings tomorrow.i'm blardy excited.
town- here i come bebeh!

and the uncle is bringing me and bro to vivo tmr as well.for movie.hurhur.
i never want my uncle to get married.then his money will be spent on me instead of the girlfriend,if he have one (which i doubt so).haha.i'm a selfish bitch.who cares?
you're just plain jealous.!

2007-08-23T20:06:00.000+08:00

ok,i got no mood to meet the friends.cuace tak mengizinkan betul.
furthermore,i'm cashless.how like that?
no fags,no money and i got chalet coming up this monday.
i'm super duper cooper zuper excited.

three years just past and it seems like just yesterdae i've known them.
nonetheless,i made sucha great friends.someone who kept me rooted to my culture and religion,at the same time,not being shallow and kental.even though i'm sucha "minah" in their eyes,we just blend in so well.i'm blessed when it comes to friends,i think.
i'm so gonna miss school.like fuck.i'm gonna miss those cheebye and tetek gangs in lectures.their lame-ness.those crap-talkers.haha.

i was making my way to yishun from school when my heart was so heavy.then,i realised.its gonna be the last time.
so without hesitation,i looked back and stare for a few seconds.wachey,sentimental sial aku.kalau boleh nak ambek grass atau meja,abeh simpan siak buat momento.to those o-level-ians,consider nyp as ur first choice.u won't regret i say.

i'm happy now that the exams are finally over.time for me to earn some cash.*kecing
aini and faridah's birthday is coming.
*pray hard that september didnt exist.amin.hehe.

2007-08-22T19:46:00.000+08:00

don't ask me about the interview i had this morning.
confirm tak dapat nye case.

i'm gonna drown myself with caffeine tonight.
2 more books and ten more hrs for the papers bebeh.
i cant wait for weekends.the past 2 weeks has been so draggy.

accompany nettik to beach rd to get her shirts.
haha,i free-loader ar today,cos nettik was supplying me with fags.

i got summon to pay.
200 bucks.cheebye nye fuck.
i desperately need a job.
fauzy works at borders.i wanna go try.
any takers?

ok bye.enough for the day.

2007-08-21T21:20:00.000+08:00

i didnt mention much about myself in the blog recently.

i miss my life when nothing seems compelling.

when i watched couples behaving intimately,and proudly say i'm happy!

when laughter is an orgasms.

when girls-talk is an aphrodisiac.

seriously,i'm shagged.

i'm not looking forward to anything now.

nothing seems to be in favour of me nowadays.

haha.on a lighter note,i'm left with one more paper.

oh yarh.few of my friends said i lose weight.

aku happy.hahha.

the secret?try smoking,it helps.seriously.

update more later.the onco book is calling my name .

thanks for being a friend.

talk to me again if you think.

your not that guilty

2007-08-07T13:38:00.000+08:00

ok,exams next weeks.
no,i'm not complaining.
more like worried.satu benda haram aku belum hafal.
aku mati la.kene bunuh dgn exam question.takda action langsung!
movie confirm takda orang nak tgk.aku paham,da merepeks.
aku asyik melungsuri internet aje...menghafalnye tidak.

ok bye.
aku nak pergi PANIC! AT THE DISCO.

2007-08-07T12:00:00.000+08:00

peoples,goes takes a cups of coffees.hehe.
longs entrys ar!haha.grammar idiot.

i'm sorry it ended this way.
you told me,"its not fair for me cause it has always been work or you".
well,i overlooked that part.
i told you right from the start,that i'm not ready for commitment and still exploring my options.
commitment is such a strong word that i will go kneeling down to whoever that will grant me to be liberated.thats how freedom fucking means to me.
i'm just used to being single that i didn't realise what i did,hurt you that bad.
maybe its wrong for me to lead you on,i admit.or perhaps i had "sweet revenge" in mind.
to make myself vindicated,it was actually insecurity that made you run,it wasn't me.
i'm self-centred?maybe.
i'm putting my dignity at bay and making a public apology to you.
i apologize,sincerely.
*if your not accepting,then karma will come knocking on my door soon.haha.to his ex,i'm releasing myself from your sorrows.no more cursing and swearing of my existence.i'm sorry for being the third-party.apologies.

i told you before and i'm saying it again.i hide things from you cos i had my own reasons.
i never ever want you to get hurt.ever.cause that was purely out of the question.
i confess this is not the first time.i understand you've been hurt enough.and i don't want you to go through that cycle again.
BUT DOES THAT GIVES YOU A REASON TO ACTUALLY DO THINGS BEHIND MY BACK?
we promised what happens there,stays there.period.that was why i initiate the *ehem* at *ehem*.
ok,a promise is a promise.cannot disclose.dun force horh!
when i told you about the situation,i was waiting for your palm to actually land on my face.
ok i exaggerate,i know your not that violent.but i was hoping for you to give me a thrashtalk.i seriously need a lashing from you after what i've done.i give access to that.
surprisingly,you were calmed enough to say "bla...bla...bla".thanks for that.

well,true enough what you said was just to make yourself or myself feel better.i have no fucking idea what was going through your mind when you had that its-ok-i-know-things-happen-sometimes attitude.
i never harbour any thoughts to play you on.i repeat,NEVER.
i swear even if i had sex with a guy,i would tell you.
just give me some time to put my points acrossed so that i won't further aggravate the matter.
why do you think i initiate that thing?cause i thought things will just fall in place for you.

i need you to alleviate the matter.
illuminate me with your words.
i need something more prononuced from you.not just "it's ok"
you should know i love my tam-tam.
if religion permits,i will marry you.get it?

Cause we're moving on and we can't slow down

These memories are playing like a film without sound

And I keep thinking of that night

I didn't know much of love

But it came too soon

And there was me and you

2007-07-13T16:52:00.000+08:00

Friday the 13th.
TGIF.is the love.

next week.

2 presentations including my final year project.
2 skills test.
theory test.
exams time-table will be out.

feel me people.exam is a month away.

so far yet so near.

i want to marry a husband whose a sadist.

i think i'm considering a drug-addict and a drunkard as well.because atiqah told me that there is a higher chance of me getting to heaven if i die while being bitten up by the husband.isteri contoh ar.even if he got home sober,i will wait for him at the door and hand him over a parang or rotan so he can beat me up.haha.and wont make him stop till i bleed.ok enough,sadist abes.

i think the 4 of us power rangers,are really really getting out of hand.i swear in time to come,people will boycott us.korang jangan sial!chalet nak datang,mampos nanti yang lain campak kita suruh tidur kat hutan.haha.dah 3rd year pon perangai masih tak ubah2.

to him,i swear you will be stuck with her all your life.i guess i'm quite tough in a way,to go through all this.kalau pompan lain,confirm dorang dah sunatkan kau dua kali.haha.well,jadi la jantan for once.stop saying "i love you,but i'm stuck with her" again and again.as the orang tua punya rap saying,cakap tak guna tembak tak kena.

prove a point.

i'm not her.she's not me.i smoke,she dont.she prays 5 times a day,i dont.she's a tits-flasher,i'm not.she needs to be home by 7pm.while 1am is my last call.see the differences?

takpela,aku dah happy sekarang.

*to that coast guard,will you be my makeout buddy?

2007-07-11T19:04:00.000+08:00

I miss my b-girls.

we shall updates with our ever so indigenous and mundane life all over again.

tampok-ians wan suey.

2007-07-09T16:22:00.001+08:00

perhaps i'm just a passerby in your life.
i think its time for you to wake up and synchronised your thoughts.
you were no longer in the same frquency as us.

Ask yourself have you change?u would have shouted NO.bluntly.
but then,who don't when they are pose which such questions.
enlighten me with your call and messages.
where is the old "you" ?
the one that can't wait for weekends to come and spent times with us.
we are drifting apart.perhaps an artificial barrier is stopping us.
if that is the case,then i want it to go away.soon.

*nettik.......gue rindu banget samak lok.
call gue ya.kita lepak dengan itu jasminik skali.

2007-06-28T16:33:00.000+08:00

I WANT THEM TO BE MY NEIGHBOURS.

2007-06-27T13:18:00.000+08:00

ok,*ehem *ehem.
i know you guys miss me,due to the lack of updates.

so many things happened but majority are insignificant.
bear that in mind.

to the both of you,don't let the abilities of man get in the way.
not worth it i say,but easier said than done.aku paham.

Aini
i swear i feel fucking bad that i was keeping things from you.i never had the intention to lead you on further.ganging up with amirul was not the priority.my motives was not to wipe off that smile on your face.i know you too well,i want you to be happy.
S.O.R.R.Y.
never mention about being homo again.sumpah aku tembak kau!

Siti
u were never the third party.
things happened,and it happened for a reason.never get things in the way between us since u got him.ada hal bole berbual ey minah rock.
smoking weed is bad bitch!haha.

Sometimes i keep drowning myself with other's problems.
I'm willing to forego anything in this world ,except the both of them.
dorang macam side-kicks aku gitu ar.

Ardian and i are back on track,again.
some of u may start swearing and cursing me already.aku paham.
his off days = must meet-up session!
thats how possesive i am.haha.

oh ya,in school now dengan atiqah.
planning to cabot,but the boyfriend had to run some errands before meeting up.
atiqah,sapa kawan kau sekarang?answer with your heart.haha.drama beb.

ok.saturday = i'm not looking forward but anticipating.
because i'm having my dental appmt on that day which means i have to force myself eating porride for breakfast,lunch and dinner.something to moan about for me.
but.....i will be spending the whole day with the boyfriend and minah-gempak.
yes ar.aku nak!
jom.
how i wish saturday will never end.

*lets kiss under the moonlight,again.

2007-06-14T02:10:00.000+08:00

so tomorrow i will be out from my house.
fuck dammit.
i am so so so gonna miss my spastics minah-gempaks.
may 6 months be over like no one's business.

mak aku kelakar abes.
dia beli dvd pochong.then throughout the whole movie,she was wearing sun-glasses.
hahaha.
mom:ey hanif,kecik kan la suare.kuat sangat tu.
hanif:dah kecik la nie.
mom:kecik kan je la,mama takot nie.kau jgn degil ey!
hanif:ape nie kecik kan suare aje.....mama tak paya tengok la.susahkan hanif je.buat ape tgk kalau tak dgr suare abeh asyik tutup mata aje.ape saje la.
mom:kurangajar kau ey!! @#$$#

my holiday is sucking up most of my leisure time.
and i got no more fags.something to moan about.
and i seriously need a holiday.kanina betol.
i'm craving for satay.

last night lepak was downbeat.even though we didn't talked much,i was pretty much contented.
to be with you till 2am in the morning,and reminiscence about the times we once shared almost bring tears to my eyes.
but then i thought,things happen for a reason.i'm seeing it as a blessing in disguise.

xxx to the girl.u won.u got back what u've always wanted.happy now?
you tried to meet him discreetly but were caught red-handed,are you happy with your role?
it's funny to me how you've turned into suca joke.haha.

beautiful girl,can we kissed and play pretend till the dawn break through.

2007-06-13T03:09:00.000+08:00

flames to dust

lovers to friends

why do all good things come to an end

i was hoping for things to change.perhaps the situation.

all i did was cry myself to sleep,thinking it will be over when i woke up.

it get worsened.

xxx i will be waiting on 15th june.call me.

2007-06-12T02:42:00.000+08:00

its 2.42 am.
i think i'm not sleepy.but i'm having a mild headache.
i thinks thanks to ardian.cause we were sitting in the rain 6hrs ago for a few mins.
he say "u won't die,its only water".
fuck.kepala otak.skrg kepala aku dah ada koyok nie.tak glam langsung.
ok this is random.
the rihanna cry track has been on the repeat mode in my playlist.
now,it has been playing for the 36th times.
both my buah-hati chuchu is missing their firefighters.
i love hillary duff!

i still remember the convo between aini and ardian
aini:ey,kau pakai singlet ey kat dlm?
ardian:tak ar,aku pakai coli.
hahhahah.

xxx those were the days.
so make me promises boy,the kind i know u can keep.

2007-06-12T01:30:00.000+08:00

everyone has been very supportive of me.
the classic ones will be "u lost the battle la wanie,ur tits not as h.o.t as her"
haha.thanks people.

we talked last night.
he tried to explain but i realised,its better not to know.
u told me i was quick to make a judgement,which was irrational.
but the trust is no longer there.
then again,u've said the choice is yours.i agree.
u mentioned about having faith in your words,i did.
be glad that u no longer have to crack your head on which pussy to choose anymore.
cause i'm more than willing to let u go.thank god we've only known for 2 months.
let this be a lesson learnt for you.

no matter how heartbroken,disheartened and pathetic looking i am now.
its you that i feel sorry for.

ok i'm fucking excited.
cause rashid just msg me.i've just bought something online and his helping with the shipping thingy.
yay,i'm excited.

xxx project tmr.and the day after.and the day after.

2007-06-10T23:39:00.000+08:00

it turned out the way i've expected.it was never easy for me.
u lead me on further,deep and hard.
perhaps u want the best of both world.
i don't blamed u,cause 4yrs is long.
but that doesn't give you the license to make a move on any girl,when u have her at the back of your mind.
looking back,i realise it was a sweet lie.every single words and actions.
i thought u eventually moved on.
and i was naive to even fall for it.maybe u meant what u've said,but then again,your actions are contradicting.
i should have seen it coming,fast.

the ex is being a bitch as well.
act someone your age please,aren't u sick of playing the "who's better game" ?
sometimes i sincerely think i'm more matured than you.
and the best part is,u fucking took a half-naked bra-less pic and sent it to him.
so u can say,"its my breast and i show off to whoever i want to since his my number one."
it was uncalled for,really.if u think that photo can make things turned,then,u win.
so what if u love him?its your dignity for goodness sake.don't your parents teach u that?
i swear i will never stood to that level.
hari ni tetek,besok puki.hah,murah beb.

so i've asked a few of my boyfriends and 98% said the same thing.
"kalau aku,aku taknak sial itu minah lagik,buat main je la.pakai buang."
yes ar,korang rocks.tapi kesian ar tu minah,dia buat gitu sebabkan nak kau balik sial.hurhur.

i'm sorry to the girl and guy whos affected by this.
dont ever talk about "u fucking mind your own business and its people dignity your messing with"
erm,excuse me.....do she even had one?
and why are u complaining,cause i'm sure u wanna see it real.men.
u should be thankful that i'm not charging this media publicity.
oh wait,do this consider an advert?if yes,then sorry i got no pics to further illustrate the product.
but,its of mild condition ar i think.

ok,it seems like i'm venting my anger.
i'm just frustrated that girls nowadays are willing to do anything for the sake of "love"
come on ar,i dont see the purpose of wearing clothes anymore for the lovers out there.
go walk around town naked,thats love people!

to ardian.
tell me no more lie.dont worry,i'm not shikin.
i wont do any indecency (tits-flashing is bad) and come crying (not forgetting begging ) to you.
explanations are welcome,but the truth please.
after all,i'm just a girl not yet a woman.
alamak,jiwe britney beb.

xxx circle circle dot dot.
aini dan siti,bila mau tunjuk tetek?
tak rock ar korang! lets lick some tits

2007-06-10T01:42:00.000+08:00

i love us.minah-gempak!

our laughing,crying and whining never seems to end.

my holiday is here.but project is here also.

aini will be going for her attachment tmr.good luck ey kawan.

tak tahu any procedure,call aku!hurhur.

and my rockstar girlfriend is turning into minah rep.

soon,i will see her with blonde hair and dgr lagu trance and hiphop.

pasal matair dia nigga islam.

i'm deprived of the boyfriend now.

btw,i heard someone chanting on my window.not cool.

xxx the only moment i had hoped for,was the time that your heart would open up a new door.

2007-06-07T16:38:00.000+08:00

so fighting with the boyfriend e.v.e.r.y night is mandatory.
but last night argument was ultimate.
it turns out funny,the makeout and laughing session i mean.
i swear i was smiling myself to sleep.

15 th june is next week.
i don't want la!
i told my mom i need KL now.
i need!not i want!please bear that in mind.

ok ar.having tutorial in 8 mins time.
hurhur.seeeee yaaaaa suckass.

xxx i picture her in my sleep.
i need a time-machine.

2007-06-05T01:47:00.000+08:00

we keep going back and forth.
the arguments was unnecessary.
you told me i lied.that was inessential.
i've abide all hurdle before getting where we are.
you took my hands when the day turns to night.
place your lips against mine.
but then again,the wait seems like infinity.

xxx imagine me and u.

2007-06-03T13:54:00.000+08:00

lets meet up and not talk.

let silence reign when we walk

and guide me through this endless journey.

let the wind whisper in my ear

promise me u both never give up on me.

cause the both of u are my cup of tea.

lets club and danced the night away before the 15th ok.

and not forgetting the slumber party.

do i smell holiday?

xxx i love my mr coast guard.

the one too many conincidences.

lets go to that bus stop again ,and cherished the moment that were once gone.

2007-06-01T21:13:00.000+08:00

sometimes i feel as though i'm redundant.

i don't see the point of pursuing further.

she told me " i believe in fate and i think u should to "

well,i am.

stop being a hypocrite to your own principle cause your actions makes me sick to the stomach.

do you even realise that you're placing your dignity at stake by forcing him come back to you?

you may not,cause perhaps u only have one thing in mind ,which is to have him back.

it's not that oblivious,girl.

i'm not surprise if you decide to commit suicide one day,then,haunt him and his loved ones.

i'm not blaming you,not even once.cause i truly believe its hard.

i try to be ignorant.with the phone calls and msges.

then again,i'm not as iron-willed as you.

i'm sorry if this sounds tormenting.

2007-06-01T12:38:00.000+08:00

comp lab in school is so not fun.
every web aku type semua "access denied ",except for wikipedia.hurhur.

so its set,i will be moving out on the 15th june.
i was in tears the other day, caused i figure that i will be missing something that i'm attached to.
especially now,ardian you should know what!

so yeah,
aini will be helping me with the cleaning and painting my new home.i'm excited.
lets create our own mural ey tam.
amcam dilemma skrg?da ada dua firefighter sial!
aku pon nak jugak!
ada pergi ada balik ey minah bravo!

i hate the girl.
the one who loves my man.cheebye.

2007-05-30T16:43:00.000+08:00

oh finally,i got the time to update.

Thank You everyone for my 19th birthday wishes,poems,hugs,kisses,gifts and cakes.
it's a wonder how i managed to reimburse myself after having so many obstacles,especially now.
i dun seems to be having a time for my own anymore.
but i was lucky to have my very own power-ranger,aini.
she seems to be taking the role of my mom,watching me grow up.
i see me in her.maybe i was lying,but thats how close i want u guys to picture us.
i dont want people to fall for her. cause she's mine.and will always be.

i'm moving house soon.really soon.
i'm gonna miss aini and ardian.no more fags-and-badminton-lepaking session.
no more star-gazing with aini.no more jogging with azhar.no more fetching ardian from the train station.

i think i'm really in need of atiqah in my project.atiqah the penyakit.
haha.no more soccer for us ey atiqah.sementara tu,bole catch up with S league.
oh ya,aku looking forward for 31 august.
lets relive the moment we had in KL.
i love my power rangers! mary farid atiq anu .

i've been sleeping alot in lectures lately.
its either i go and i sleep,or i dun go at all.
holiday is coming and i want that.

xxx i love my rockstar girlfriend.
may u me and her,hang out again.

2007-05-25T00:45:00.000+08:00

yan was sweet enough to accompany me over the phone till the match was over.
even though it was not his game and that he thinks liverpool supporters are kental and suck the fuck, he set his ego aside and talked to me.
then,when the second goal came along.i was devastated,annihilated,wrecked,eradicated and more words to come.
even when kuyt scored a goal,i was not at all happy.cause i know,by then,it was too late.
to moved on,congrats to ac milan supporters.
it was a sweet sweet revenge.

mom was in a foul mood today.
she was not happy with either my elder bro or me.
then the younger bro bring home his report bo0k with a 24/100 for maths.hah!
heart attack babe.

oh ya,jordin sparks won the american idol.
she's too young to be an idol.thats what i thought.
Few years back,before Diana Degarmo and Fantasia Barrino was in the hot seat,the judges keep questioning about Diana's age.If she is too young to be an idol ( she was 17 then ).But now?hah! human.
But i'm glad the americans vote their idol wisely.very sensible indeed.
If singaporeans means,a cute guy will win.no matter how tuneless they are.hah! girls.

ey minah ,kau dah ludah abeh nak jilat balek kepe.
i suggest u to go seek help.i dunnoe how,when or where.
just go.

ok ar,tmr lecture at 8am.
and yan offered to give me a wake up call.
hurhur!

2007-05-21T10:34:00.000+08:00

i'm sucha r.e.t.a.r.d.
I proudly came to skool on time (by cab ok!) cause i'm always late,and realise my skool starts at 1pm.
Please give me a standing ovation ey friends.

Slept at 4am woke up at 9am = eye-bag.
sumpah mata aku tak sexy langsung sial.

presentation slides is killing me.and the best thing is,i had to do my research all over again cause research aku entah melalut ke mane.offtrack abes.
so power rangers,give your leader some face and i email u guys the final product by midnite.

siti is not cool.she no longer love me anymore.
she hardly see me,n i hardly saw her.
jom ar pussy whoring lagi!
*pssstttt,that only applies for azhar ey.

2007-05-21T03:16:00.000+08:00

i'm believin in fairy god-mother for the night.
grant my wish,make her go away.please.

2007-05-21T03:01:00.000+08:00

But how can you promise the world?

How can you promise your heart when it's always searching?

But I'm just like you

I don't want to deny my heart its chance to feel

I don't want to deny my soul something real

Is there anything left in this world that will satisfy me?

2007-05-19T01:21:00.000+08:00

it always gets better and better.
now i think i'm no longer cool.

6 presentations in coming weeks.
don't ask me about the progress,it has been slow,very slow.
final year is really testing my patience to the utmost limit.
not that i'm contemplating about my abilities,but my emotional needs.
lecturers never understand us,with the been-there-worse-then-you-done-that nonchalant attitude.

atiqah and faridah is the love.
i miss working with them.the quarrel,the jokes,the fun was like dancing in the moonlight.
i never thought we could be close.since the 3 of us are different.
very different.i swear.
atiqah will be the river,faridah will be the ocean and i will the longkang.
we should go out more often ey fatiq ( faridah and atiqah ).

aini and siti.
may we meet up soon.thanks.
this time,no emo fags ey.

2007-05-12T01:33:00.000+08:00

religion without science is blind
and science without religion is lame
science should support faith and turn in to something more potent
not just knowledge but something more ambitious.
truth

2007-05-06T23:52:00.000+08:00

i love it when jose mourinho looks very pissed off.
arsenal is leading.chelsea is left with ten men.
terima kasih ey.

2007-05-03T04:50:00.000+08:00

3-0.

terima kasih ar AC milan for the great game.
liverpool and ac milan = l.o.v.e.

to him
i'm sorry,but its not possible.

2007-05-02T05:28:00.000+08:00

LIVERPOOL WON.

Reina should be man of the match.He denied arjen robben and wright phillips kick.
Cool ar reina,one day i'm gonna have coffee with him.hah!
Liverpool won 4-1 on penalties.
And Rafael Benitez is sooo cool that he was sitted cross-legged on the field with his thousand dollars suit just to support his boys.
While jose mourinho is a fucking chauvinistic pig.
John terry was cryin,Lampard was dissapointed and robben was emo-ing.hur hur.

may history repeat itself and let liverpool meet Ac milan A.G.A.I.N.

bye.

2007-05-02T03:34:00.001+08:00

kudos to agger and reina in the first half.
i'm keeping my fingers crossed.still.

2007-04-30T16:46:00.000+08:00

i've found the one.
i wanna marry him.

2007-04-26T04:36:00.000+08:00

i'm not happy.
even though bellamy was substituted by crouch,it didnt end the way i wanted to.
bye.

2007-04-26T03:48:00.000+08:00

sumpah first half menyakitkan hati.
chelsea are leadin 1-0 thanks to joe cole.
those motherfuckin fuckers,chelsea did make a few shots compared to liverpool,but was denied by reina or the rail.

its was a major blunder for liverpool's defence.
that jamie carragher ar,i tell u,very disappointed in him.
ok i know this may be weird,but,i want bellamy out and crouch to be in during the 2nd half.
watever it is,i'm praying for reina to keeps his composure and liverpools back line remains impenetrable in the 2nd half.
i'm keeping my fingers,arms,toes,tongue and whatnot crossed.

tell jose mourinho to just suck the fuck.
so long.white haired old man.

2007-04-24T22:09:00.000+08:00

So he won the PFA Player and Young Player of the year award.

sumpah tamak.

But who dare deny that he don't deserve those awards?Well,i do.

For the Young player of the year award at least,it shoud be Cesc Fabregas.i think.

But nonetheless,ronaldo deserves both recognition.People just love to watch him play.

watch tonight match.

man utd vs ac milan.

i bet milan will have the possession but man utd will score.

ok mcm paham.bye.

2007-04-23T20:15:00.000+08:00

final year project is killing me.
i hate school.
i hate being in year 3.

Atiqah,aku seriously dah meluat dgn perangai kawan ko.
No wait,i never like her right from the start anyway.
Whenever she told us about her problem,i've been secretly saying "served you right".
watever ar,skola lagi 4 bulan lepas tu shes out from my sight.aku suka.

blog more later.bye.

2007-04-20T01:46:00.000+08:00

man utd will be meeting chelsea for the fa cup final.
9th may 2007.

as much as i hate man utd, i want them to win.

i made a mistake.
liverpool will be meetin chelsea in the semis for champs league.
may god watch this match and bless liverpool.

i'm sick.and school sucks.
random.bye.

2007-04-14T03:27:00.000+08:00

my intention was not to come in between you and shimah knowing that you guys have a lot to talk about,since school is starting soon.
i dont want to be known as a "wet blanket" cause i know the both of u missed each other.
thats all.clear and precise.

when i called informin u,all u did was to flare up your temper.
telling me to go home without you,bluntly,but with a twisted aura.
is that how u get your point acrossed?

if i knew things would turned out this way,then trust me,i wont be calling you informin that we are going home.
cause at least,that way,i know that i'm at fault and u have every reason to be angry with me.
that i could accept.

i'm not angry with you but with the situation.
if only my bladder could hold on much much longer.

i never thought that our friendship was so fragile,over something that is so trivial.
with your decision,i didnt see it coming.at all.i thank you for putting your trust in me all this while.

i hope we are not leadin to the foe word.
i dont want to.

p/s:when i'm dancin at the stroke of mignight tmr,just to let you know that i'm thinkin of you.and of cos expecting your msg.

*remember the rockstar i told you i'm in love with.it was you.*

2007-04-12T04:44:00.000+08:00

fuck.
gerrard tak main langsung.alonso and agger were both substituted.
one of them rambut kelakar abes.
gel maha 2 botol.tu tak pasal.RAMBUT BELAH PUKI.
maha centre-parting.hurhur.

PSV kesian.
da jatoh ditimpa tangga.they were reduced to ten men.
i seriously think he don't deserve that.i think.hehe.

and the 4th official looks like a combination of james morrison and mika.
faggot abes.

aku pagi takda keje mengutuk orang.

24th april.please mark your calender.
manchester united vs liverpool.

and ac milan will be meetin chelsea.

ok ar.mata da maha ngantok.

2007-04-12T03:44:00.000+08:00

there was a lot of tackling,sliding,hurtin,tugging and more to come.
for once i tot i was watchin wrestling.
jatuh bangun jatuh bangun.
score nye tidak.penat mata tengok.

then the free-kick from zanden.nice one,but wasted.
i'm confident gerrard will be playin 2nd half,so the best is yet to come.
me and rafael share the same sentiments in soccer.
confirm abes dia turonkan gerrard.(CEH,MACAM PAHAM)

oh yarh,the liverpool supporters are fuckin noisy.
but if i'm there,i will join the sing-a-long as well.

lastly,peter crouch.i just dont like him.
i dont even think he knows how to play soccer.everywhere he runs to,i thinks his out of place.
senang ckp,dia mcm dont belong gitu ar.

ok.to sum up.i think first half was whack for liverpool.
because steven gerrard,jamie carragher and dirk kuyt never play.
i want them in the 2nd half.
it'll be better that way because,more eye-candies for me.(xcept for kuyt of cos,cause his good)
agger and alonso is the bitch as well.handsome nak mampos.dorang kalau nak aku,aku pon nak dorang.

pple will be saying
MCM PAHAM AR WANIE!
who cares.

watever.ok.2nd half starting.
bye.

2007-04-11T04:40:00.000+08:00

7-1
most pathetic results ever.kepala otak.
and valencia is out as well.
chelsea bodoh.man utd pon bodoh.

SUMPAH AKU NAK BUNUH DORANG.
FUCKCHEEBYEFUCKCHEEBYEFUCKCHEEBYE.

2007-04-11T03:39:00.000+08:00

fuck manchester united.
they scored 3 goals during the first 20 mins.
i don't call that "excellent" playing,i call that blody suckass wanting their revenge.
thanks to that 4 goals during first half,now i got no mood to watch the 2nd half.

azhar must be jumping with joy,flying over the moon and what-not.
takpe,i bet they won be lifting the champs league trophy.
i've reached my boiling point already.
i don't see the point of playing for another fuckin 45 mins.

bye. i heard the roma-ians wailing for me.

2007-04-10T02:12:00.000+08:00

aips

graduated 2000.

when i met this bunch of people,i realised something.

that i'm already one-nine.fcuk.da tua.

ape-ape ar.aku tetap jiwa muda.

aku suka man u kalah l.a.g.i.

own goal lagi.terima kasih ar ferdinand.

lain kali buat lagi.

its hard for a defender to score ok.hur hur.

this wed.dinner with the tinggi-ness.

farina = da lame tak jumpe.

siti + farina = siti suke.

the-3-of-us = pekak.really.

ok bye.

2007-04-07T03:31:00.000+08:00

seriously cannot take it to see myself losing in a game.any game.
taiti with the prischmateswasnotfun.ijusthatelosing.

oh ya,kkh attcmnt was a bore coz i had a fugly whore for my lecturer.
berbual da lah pehlat,abe suka hati nak curse orang.cheebye.
on a lighter note,she gave me a great comment.

siti dan aini.bile nak shopping beli school-bag nie?
aku excited.kita blaja betol-betol ey.
kita bole jadi harapan negara.

i'm neither in an emotional wreck nor in a manic-depressive mode.
he has always been a great friend yesterdae,today and the future.
azhar i mean.the great fren to play a prank on.haha.

atiqah,faridah and marilyn.
whens our date?

oh ya.for the last 19 yrs,i've always tot that good fridae has got somethin to do with the buddha,or at least,the taoist.
sekali the christian.
ape sial,tak faham2 aku.
okok,happy good fridaes to all the christian.
gtg now.bye.

2007-04-07T02:45:00.000+08:00

Alone in hell, I have nowhere to turn

Memories of you, my love you spurn

In my dreams, I feel your touch

My heart is full, never so much

Time heals all wounds, this is a lie

My soul is lost, wanting to die

With broken pieces, I shall carry on

Crying forever with what's left undone

But every time I remember

My heart begins to ache

Those special times weren't real for you

Your smile was just a fake

2007-04-06T02:11:00.000+08:00

i just love it when man u lost.

the eyebag to work is worth it.

2007-04-03T02:55:00.000+08:00

extracted from jasmine's previous post

I kinda missed hanging out with Kim, Wanney and Netty.I remember there was one time I almost die laughing because of Wanney and Netty. The both of them will always bicker around, making funny faces and yeah, they are always just so crazy and daring to do funny stuffs.

i miss them,seriously.
when can we ever relive the once anticipated company every weekend again.

my tongue is not getting any better.i miss aini already.
my midnite jog and star-gazing partner.
cheebye betul.and why must u go without me?
thanks ar minah.t.h.a.n.k.s.

siti is bein sucha pussy as well.she no longer care to msg me.
coz she got another pussy to entertain which makes me sooner or later deprived of her pussy-ness and later i go aroundpussy-ing other pussies which makes us pussies ever pussy-er just becoz she got that pussy to start with.
thanks ar minah.t.h.a.n.k.s.

last week,i went for my lip threadin and icriedforthewholesessionswhichlastabout5mins.its suicidal i tell u.really.At that point,i just feel like grabbing the meenachi's boob and tell her to be lenient with that lip of mine.i swear.
but my inner self told me not to contaminate the ever so gentle hands of mine.
so i tolerated,with tears rolling down my cheeks.feel me people.
abes aku,segala macho sume hilang.

pm shift tmr.boringgggggggg.
do msg me,cos msging is a form of entertainment to me especially during work.not that i never realised that.duh.

2007-04-02T03:00:00.000+08:00

i'm havin doubt about my health.everythin i gobbled down,taste salty.
my family and i were having dinner at Sakura,but i dunt feel excited at allcoz i think i'm havin a sore tongue.

me:masin ey sume lauk kat sini.
mom:maner ade! ko asal bole je.
me:????

so yeah,click on the web and i found out that its a sign of havin a brain tumour lar guys.i swear i was in cold sweats.

the aini is goin redang enjoyin herself while i'm nursin a broken heart,and not forgetting the sore tongue.i'm not sure if its even a sore!

kkh later.in 4 hrs time.
bye mofos.

2007-04-01T22:26:00.000+08:00

Should I smile

because we were friends,

or cry, because that's all we will ever be

2007-03-31T16:37:00.000+08:00

So,mos was unintended.Had a ballistic fun,oh man who doesnt?

when the heart is nestled in btwn the girlfriends.

but pple keep giving us this u-should-n.o.t-be-here kinda look.like as though WE smuggled in with rice sack carried by some coolie.

to those who think i'm tooo innocent to be in mos,then i take it as a compliment.whatever.

i'm not like some vain-pot who put tonnes of make up and concealer to relief their insecurity.

barely there dresses is ok(do i look like i give a damn if ur a victim of some sadistic rapist?),but opera chinese make-up is a nono.

coz i dun wanna get a heart attack and faint while dancin.

and suddenly,everyone knows CPR.classic!

after mos-sing.i realised something.

i love ang-moh girls!

how i wish.

to that bartender,thank you la hor.thats all.hah.

alamak korang,aku nk dgn waiter tu la.muka kental,aku suka.

kkh is on monday.can't wait.

2 more weeks to skool.yadayada.

last nite jog was fun becoz of the air kelapa.and azhar nye jog mcm aku nye sprint la kan.mesti la,ko tinggi,kaki ko lagik panjang.

ur one step is my three steps.so if u take 30 steps for 100m,then u do the math how many steps i shall take.

i have not been watchin soccer.must start to watch!must!must!must!champs league quarter-final on 3rd april.

"your front teeth is soo gap-py,that you need a socks to floss it".--copyrighted from yo momma-

2007-03-26T18:00:00.000+08:00

The laptop has been giving me sucha fucked up time.Since when did i reset for it to be turned on and off automatically every 30 mins?
The keyword is a.u.t.o.m.a.t.i.c.a.l.l.y.
and blogger is being sucha pussy.fuck technology.

oh wait,i dont want to lived in a cavemen century.i cant stand the sight of me walking around naked nonchalantly.
and not forgettin the only entertainment is SEX.
my apology,bill gates,thomas edison and whoever-is-the-father-of-technology.

ok back to my life.i miss my patients at imh.
each have their own antics.so funny,i'm willin to work there one day,even though the environment sucks.

i was with siti yesterdae,and realised the both of us are in the same boat.
not exactly the same,but more or less the same.hah.
ok,gtg doll up now.
bye

waiting for u is like waiting for the rain in a drought.
useless and disappointing.

2007-03-23T00:14:00.000+08:00

so yarh,by now most people should know that NOFX is comin to Singapore on 20 april.

But 251 by t0y factory prodn is first on the list cos i'm not a NOFX fan.i wanna go watch!

Its about how annabel chong, burst into history in 1994 in a world-record sex marathon with 215 men.so the numbers are,by right, self-explanatory.

i feel like my life is so mundane with monotonous pace and no added flavour.

i miss school.

i miss having dinner with my family.

i miss talkin to my mom.

i miss watchin soccer with my dad.

i miss my bro talkin to me about his gameboy.

destitute child.

i dunooe why but heroes looks so gimmick-ky.

segala-galanya gimmick semata-mata.

everything is sooo fiction,the producer must be one hell of a marvel comics fan.intelligent person indeed.

bottomline is,prison break is still the syiok-ness!

tahniah kepada siti hajar.

my former green marlins mates,semoga anda gembira berada di NYP nanti.

geek is the new cool.

2007-03-18T17:14:00.000+08:00

i'm excited.

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles will be out soon!

2007-03-18T01:03:00.000+08:00

i'm totally broke!i'm left with 20 dolars for 5 days,please feel me guys.
pay day is next week,i want.

5 more days for imh.
its seems like forever.i miss my power rangers.

btw,i'm playin checkers with sunder now.haha.
w.o.n.d.e.r.s

farina,lets go have english lessons with siti again!
cannot =tak boleh

mahes,if i was in your position.
i would save my ass from the girlfriend as well.
well said about me thou!

2007-03-14T16:20:00.000+08:00

today was a fuckin cheebye day for me.and its my mom birthday as well.

i fuckin woke up late at 7am.orang dah start kerje aku baru nak bgn.
so go bath and took 965,then halfway yanching called,told me not to come!
what the mother-fuckin fuck?ok,so the next step was to go get MC.

Took 965 back to yishun polyclinic.and guess what? i lost my phone for the 6th times i think.i left it in the bus.to the soul who has been blessed to found my gorgeous phone,YOU FUCKING RETURNED IT BACK TO ME!
However,for some reason,i find the ability to recollect myself and start thinkin of comin up with an excuses to get myself a MC.maybe i'm immune already.ha!

then its my turned to see the doc.
so he ask me to take a seat.
doc:k,tell me whats wrong with u.
me:oh,i loss my appetite for the last week.
doc:somemore?
me:i didnt pass motion for the last 4 days and occasionally i have stomach cramps.
(fyi,i didnt make up the whole symptoms)
doc:show me where is your cramps?
me:lift up my shirt and showed him where.
then he stared at his computer for few secs and turn to me.
doc:when was the last time u did ur blood test?
me:for what?i'm not sick what.
doc:u know u have a high risk of gettin thallassaemia and thyroid disorder rite?
me:ya.so?i'm not a carrier of both disorder since i did a blood test the other time.
doc:and when was that?
me:erm..i think 2001.but the SGH doc say i'm ok.
doc:no,u have to check ur blood yearly! i cannot diagnose u anytin yet until i get back ur blood test results in 3 days time.
me:u mean ur takin my blood now?i came here about my loss of appetite wat.
doc:yeap,but we need further investigation.

so there,i got more than just MC.i'm scared of peo0ple pokin me ok.and now i'm scared of the results.h0pe its negative.
oh ya,pass my exams.and so does the power rangers.i love.

i will be replacin on saturday mornin A.L.O.N.E.not cool.for the first time,i hate saturdays.

avril lavigne looks like paris hilton in her girlfriend video.
one word,merepeks.
k la,i love chris richardson.he makes me fall in love with geek in the pink for the first time.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!
I HARDCORELY LOVE YOU.

2007-03-13T01:16:00.000+08:00

imh is menakotkan.scariest place i ever stepped in.

9 more days to go.

siti,call me.i wanna know what happen.

and to u,running away from reality is the coolest shit kepe.

then with utmost respect,i'll st0p haunting u.fuck off.

results later,i cant wait!

2007-03-12T01:27:00.000+08:00

i'm excited about tmr.imh kepe.

thanks ar spurs for the good games.
from the bottom of my heart i wanna say, I HATE CHELSEA.
chelsea's fan can go fly-kite in dreamin of winnin the FA cup.

i miss yo momma's joke on mtv.and i miss greys anatomy as well.
yesterday i dreamt that i was at underoath gig,they were playing reinventin ur exit.power rangers sheeznits sial.
alamak pe0ple,i'm soo sick of spore.
i found out that my former pri sch mates is actually my fren's (siti) fren's (nurul) fren's (munah) fren (marsita).there u go.see the link?this is the 84942346 times i'm sayin about the same topic,cannot help it la guys.
and yarh,now the bay has been congested with e.m.o-k.i.d.s.same hairstyle,same beg,same shirt and same shoes.
why oh why?

siti and aini,we were never like this before.never.
to be honest,i'm the caused of the whole problems.
i'm sorry.
the peace treaty is awaiting us.

gtg now.bye.

2007-03-11T01:50:00.000+08:00

i once told a fren i cannot live without u.maybe its true.
sometimes i wonder wats in u that makes u ,YOU.
u are neither special,gifted or talented in any ways,but i still prefer u.
no matter how bad u hurt my feelings,i still find the strength to forgive u.
replacing someone like u is never an 0ption,which makes me realise what makes u so likeable in my eyes.

i told u i need time to regain the trust i once had in u .
and all u said was,i'm willing to wait .

and to Siti Hajar-Lu gua punya beb!
he may never be possible,but she might.

2007-03-10T04:35:00.000+08:00

i cannot sleep la.dammit.

2 more days for attachment.dammit again.hate that darn word.

ok,i'm craving for durians,soup tulang,air kelapa and murtabak now.random shit.

Btw,i've watched the champs league draw.And Liverpool will be meeting PSV while Valencia will be meeting Chelsea.I'm rooting for liverpool and valencia for the semis,anyone with me?

Atiqah,jgn sedih ey Arsenal da out.Theres always next year!Btw,champs league dont ever support CHELSEA.Kalau ko support,aku bunuh ko!haha.tgk pic kat atas,aku rindu KL la.The bus ride,the getting mad at someone,the rock,the never-ending walk from petaling street just to get a fucking taxi and the ramli burger.

gtg rest my eyes.

bye bitches.

2007-03-09T01:32:00.000+08:00

I'm sorry it has to end this way.I thought we could be strong after wat happen.I guess this is the best way to end it.

I dont blame u no more.The nightmare i once imagined came true.
I always thought ours was unshakeable.It was undeniably awesome.With the loss of one,i really thought we can make it through.

You left me in a disheartening position.no signs of remorsed from u.
The first time u did this to me,i swallowed my pride and forgave u.sincerely.Never do i expect a second one from u.and this time,i witnessed it.

i was hurt,the moment u turned your back against me.i can choose to approach u that very night,but i was afraid of humiliating u,thats not me.all i did was cry myself to sleep.i was naive to trust u whole-heartedly.

2 days later

u tried to convinced me,but i believe in what i saw.i don't want u to keep on lying.

6/03/2007-i make it clear.We are through.

it doesnt mean we're enemies now.perhaps,u still exist in my heart.a part of me still yearning for u.

i'm not having delusions of grandeur,pointing the blame all on you..maybe,i've made a very rash decision to end it this way.even if i did,just take it as a lesson learnt for the both of.

2007-03-08T23:27:00.000+08:00

i love imogen heap-pis